Canada - Justin Trudeau Welcomes hamas
SATIRE
Photo by Timothy Dykes on Unsplash
The grapevine has it that Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, known for his penchant for colourful socks and equally bright political gestures, might be on the brink of extending an invitation to hamas for a friendly Canadian sojourn.
A logical evolution to hosting Khalistani separatists presents Trudeau musing, “Well, diversity is our strength, right?” So why not extend the spectrum of inclusion to hamas? After all, in this world, I am the centre —and I’d get so many new Liberal voters, and Sophie will return to me.
Picture this: A mock ceremony where Trudeau, donning a suit embroidered with peace doves and maple leaves, welcomes the hamas delegation on the tarmac in Toronto. The red carpet rolled out isn’t just any carpet, but one meticulously woven with maple leaves and threads of ‘tolerance.’ As they exchange pleasantries and humorous anecdotes about their homelands, Trudeau is seen eloquently emphasizing the beauty of tolerance.
As they sat down for a whimsical dinner, bonding over their shared dislike of Israel, Trudeau leaned in and, with a twinkle of humour in his eyes, exclaimed, “Netanyahu doesn’t respond to your texts too? He keeps changing his phone number more times than a Mossad agent on a covert op!” The room erupts into laughter as even the sternest faces from the hamas delegation crack a smile.
The hamas delegation, catching on to the upbeat tone, responded with a chuckle, “Yes, that Netanyahu guy never answers the phone. Must have a dedicated line just for dodging calls!”
As the laughter subsides and they delve into discussions over cups of Tim Hortons, the agenda humorously veers towards a joint venture in developing a new line of “peaceful” rockets. “Perhaps produced by Bombardier,” Trudeau added. The conversation then takes a turn towards housing, as Trudeau suggests a grand plan to accommodate 2 million Palestinians. “We have plenty of space in Canada,” he quips, the room again echoing with laughter. Unfortunately, Canadians aren’t the ones laughing.
Sadly, most Canadians likely at this point would not be surprised if any of the aforementioned occurred — after all, as the Liberals accuse the Conservatives of US-style politics, they continue to lead in attacks, fear-mongering, and narrative control measures. Elon Musk declared on X the global awakening ushering the death of the Woke agenda — when will the Government of Canada realize they’re past their expiry date?
As the nation anxiously awaits the electoral battle, one can only hope that the voice of the masses will rise above the clamour of political rhetoric and usher in a new era of governance that truly embodies the spirit and aspirations of Canadians. Until then, the satire will continue.